How to Build a Successful Coaching Business

Successful Coaching Business

Successful Coaching Business

To build a successful coaching business, especially in the parenting coaching niche, read on…

As the coaching industry has grown and changed, ACPI stays on the cutting edge, consistently offering the latest trends in both coaching and business development. Now is the perfect time to launch your coaching career and we are here to help.

 

Learning how to build a successful coaching practice is both harder and easier than you think it will be. Trust me, I know! I am Dr. Minette Riordan and I became a Certified Coach for Parents through the Academy for Parent Coaching International in 2006. I have used every single skill I learned in that coaching certification over the years – I became a better parent, a better wife and a better business owner thanks to the tools and knowledge I gained.

At the time, I was also running a successful publishing company and I decided to continue to focus on that business and not start a private coaching practice. Rather than individual coaching, I chose to step into  training other new ACPI coaches on marketing and how to start and build  successful coaching businesses. I loved helping other coaches get their businesses going and hearing all of the passion and enthusiasm they brought to their coaching.

 

“On of the things I have appreciated the most about ACPI is the ongoing support over the years. As the coaching industry has grown and changed, ACPI stays on the cutting edge, consistently offering the latest trends in both coaching and business development”

~ Dr. Riordan

Then in 2012, I sold my publishing company and moved my family across country. It felt like the time was finally right for me to build a successful coaching business. I had the training and the skills, I had the marketing sense and I had the passion for serving others. I also had the support of ACPI founder Dr. Caron Goode. But, I didn’t have clients, I didn’t have contacts in my local area and I didn’t have a clear sense of who I wanted to coach and what problems I could solve for them. I realized that even though I excel at helping others with their branding and marketing, I really struggled to define my own target market.

fizzletosizzlecoverI did know that I wanted to work with women entrepreneurs. Last year Dr. Caron Goode and I co-authored a book From Fizzle to Sizzle: 4 Crucial Tools Relationship Repair. This book is an expansion of our core parent coaching principles to the field of relationship repair. This fall, I had the pleasure of teaching a new group of students these tools so that they can become successful Relationship Coaches. In working with these new coaches and my own private coaching clients, I realized why building a successful coaching business is both easy to do and quite daunting for the newcomer. It takes so much more than just great coaching skills.

It’s taken me over a year to clarify my business vision and start to generate steady income. I tell you this not to scare you off from being a coach. In fact, if you are considering coaching as a career, just do it! In building a successful coaching business, your values and your vision become crystal clear. ACPI has an amazing lineup of programs coming in 2014-2015.

I have never had so much fun as I have coaching clients this year. As I started working with individuals, getting to know their challenges and also learning more about my own process and how I like to work, my vision of what I was building became clearer and clearer. I took some classes and hired a coach to help me clarify and focus on what I needed to do to consistently generate business.

ACPI.YourCoachingTools

At the core of everything were the powerful coaching tools I originally learned 7 years ago through ACPI’s program for building a successful coaching business. I know lots of other coaches and have investigated many different programs – no one is teaching the same tools in the same way as ACPI. I have found these tools to effectively get to the heart of any issue for my clients: their parenting, love relationships or business development. The tools have broad application. When you combine these phenomenal tools with a clarity of who you want to work with and how to find your ideal clients, success is a given.

Here’s what I learned about how to build a successful coaching practice

The easy parts for me:

  • Signing up new clients (I like sales and yes, I am a bit insane, but you have to love talking to people  to succeed in this business.)
  • Working with clients
  • Creating programs
  • Planning
  • Designing my branding and marketing
  • Writing (books, blogs, sales pages…) I dig all that!

The hard parts for me:

  • Staying consistent and visible in front of my target audience
  • Stepping out into a new community with a new identity (I owned a publishing company for a decade, I knew who I was!)
  • Not having a supportive group of other women entrepreneurs to network with
  • Mastering social media (still working on it…)
  • Creating an actionable and consistent marketing plan that works for coaching
  • Getting everything done in a timely manner without feeling overwhelmed
  • Making time for business and family

While it is crucial to get great training and practice skills to become a certified coach, it is also imperative to understand how to build successful coaching  business. You have to know your own strengths and weaknesses. You also need to know that building a successful coaching practice requires you to think about multiple ways to generate revenue. This is called multiple income streams, it’s time to think bigger than just one on one coaching.

That is why I am so excited that ACPI is expanding their programs to offer a business-in-a-box model for next year. Details will be coming soon. On of the things I have appreciated the most about ACPI is the ongoing support over the years. As the coaching industry has grown and changed, ACPI stays on the cutting edge, consistently offering the latest trends in both coaching and business development. Now is the perfect time to launch your coaching career and we are here to help you build a successful coaching business for  your favorite people.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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5 Ways To Recognize Intuitive Children

Raising intuitive children
popotweets

RT @Carlynrl: “The power of intuitive understanding will protect you from harm until the end of your days.” – Lao Tsu
intuitive children

What if …? asks the creative, intuitive, feeling child.

Intuitive Children are commonly misunderstood…

…because their creative  nature could be perceived as willful, misbehaving, pushing limits, and restless. Often the truer reality is their temperament is curious, exploratory and creative.

Digging deeper into the temperament traits explains how these traits serve this temperament’s drive to fulfill the needs as well as the calling.

Case in point: As an intuitive child, Tom spent hours roaming the shores of Chesapeake Bay where his parents had a small beach house. He heard music playing in his head, and often hummed out loud to the melody. Sometimes when his parents spoke to him or called him for a family meal, he didn’t hear them. He was focused internally on the music that would come and go. In his feeling awareness, he felt it was time for dinner and would head home. However he was never acknowledged for coming home on his own.  Rather he was always punished for being late, talked to about not listening to his parents, and all of this “discipline” could have been handled differently if his parents understood his temperament, how he took in and learned about his environment.

First Way

Intuitive children, also called the artistic-type or creative temperament among other terms, move through the world according to their inner feeling and rhythm. Of the 4 core temperaments, this child could be called the non-conformist.  As one of my special education co-teachers said, “These kids live in their creative zones, not the time zone.” She was referring to their internal rhythm, the circadian rhythm, which can be disrupted by the need for movement or restlessness.

Second Way

These children have a need for movement or you can observe a restlessness like tapping, kicking legs, or squirming. Circadian

USA National Book Award in Parenting for intuitive children

Raising Intuitive Children won the USA National Book Award in the Parenting category.

rhythm differences account for this, as well as sleeping differently from other children of the same age. The disruptive sleeping patterns alter the executive thinking skills.  Sleep disruption can be common if self-regulation or regular schedules did not solidify in childhood

Third Way

This optimistic child is an adventurer, and his or her curiosity drives exploration and pushing limits. This is not willful, so much as the way the child learns…exploring  the environment through feelings.  The child needs exposure in the early years to varied forms of activity and allowed to indulge curiosity until child feels she is done with the experience.

This child is a risk taker, to the point of being called fearless. Loving to explore the limits of the environment reminded me of the children who start crawling and then walking and they explore all textures, corners, materials, foods and such. When the intuitive child matures, the curiosity turns to a creative bent, like Tom hearing music in his mind, or like writers, who describe their creative processes as hearing and feeling their story characters.

Fourth Way

The feeling child  is empathic and approaches the world uniquely and differently than the hearing, seeing, touching learning preferences. For example, the feeler is acutely aware of how his parents or her siblings are emotionally. When the emotional or feeling atmosphere with a parent or in the home is chaotic, the child may act out chaotically. When harmony prevails, the child feels more peaceful.

One other way the feeler child is affected could be physically. Some children don’t like belts around their waists. Others don’t like itchy materials. Still others don’t wear tight shoes, or anything confining, like a tie or collar, around their neck. Some children prefer soft, comfy bedding, and others like no pillows and lying flat.

Fifth Way

Because the creative child is generally an active explorer, having a parent who enjoys the physicality and exploration offers the parent an opportunity to focus the direction and activity into confidence building and regulation. What you would notice is the mood of optimistic child can escalate quickly. Likewise the mood can dip into boredom or sulking.

This child’s esteem is an internal feeling of success.  The don’t feel the words of a coach or parents who says, “Good job,” or “You did great,” as much as they want to express their feelings about doing or being good or not good.

Intuitive Children  need to feel competent because they have become proficient in mastering a thespian role, being a goalie in soccer, or painting and liking the result. When the feeling of good, successful, or accomplished anchor emotionally within them, they are on their way in that skill set.

The creative factor often lead these intuitive kids to an entrepreneurial spirit early on as they have great ideas and want to se if their work!

 

 

Key to Financially Successful Parent Coaches

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Financially Successful parenting coachesEntrepreneurship calls the restless souls who wants to serve as a financially successful parent coaches. In economic tough times, entrepreneurs flourish. Focusing that same time and energy on developing a new service or filling a need in a community could make that person a successful entrepreneur in the financially successful coaching business.I read a recent news article that in time of economic downturn, the time and energy any person spent looking for another job can be exhausting, and not finding one can cause a sense of hopelessness.

That made sense to me. I understood hopelessness. Major surgery in 2000 left me feeling like attempting anything more than getting well was overwhelming. Then, after the events of 9/11, our seminar business grinded to a halt quickly. I refused to give up finding a passion I could make financially successful.

 

What Next to Be Financially Successful?

If people could not come to us, we would go to the people, and the Academy for Coaching Parents International forged ahead to offer other entrepreneurs like moms and dads the chance to work at home and be available to their children. Many have become financially successful entrepreneurs.Yet, as the body healed, I had more hope and cultivated optimism. In January of 2013, all of the fifteen web sites associates with my books, coach training and wellness, I had to ask if throwing in the towel was the right move.

One of my mentors for the Academy whose book I was helping with was a self-made multimillionaire. When I asked how he went from being a teacher to a millionaire, he encouraged me to focus one hour a day on the marketing of the Academy for Coaching Parents. He explained that focused attention on an object has an exponential affect – in short, what you focus on manifests. That was his secret and soon became mine also. Focusing on the act of creating something new provides a different perspective from those around you.

Focus on the formation of a financially successful business like the Academy brought out strengths that were waiting to be used again. Resilience surfaced and opened the door to passion. which fueled more focus. That kind of focus moves helplessness out of the way, making room for hope, creativity, and of course, more focus, and eventually financially successful in the role you love!

 

 

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Coaches’ Income Streams with Ready-to-Go Coaching Biz

Create the Bigger Income Model

Coaches’s income streams takes planning premium content in varied formats and specific marketing sources to insure that you meet your income goals.

 

For the first time, ACPI has created the ready-to-go biz-in-a-box for ACPI Relationships Coaches. review the income streams right here. 

For you marketing magic and success. ACPI developed the content and packaged it for you. Here is how it works with income streams.

 

Create the Bigger Income Model

Create the Bigger Income Model

Setting Realistic Goals for Multiple Income Streams 

Coaches are interpersonal helpers and need emotional and financial security. Most coaches I’ve met are not financially savvy people, but willing to learn and gain the financial planning skills.

So I ask, “How much do you want to earn?”

“Well,” the coach responds,”I guess it depends on what clients are willing to pay?”

“Wrong. It depends on what you want to earn? Let’s start planning what you want to earn.”

To make an annual income of $40, 000 you would spend 18 hours a week working one-to-one with clients. Add five hours a week to consistently market your coaching practice, and you have 23 hours total of your work week. Most likely you would have no more hours available if you have other people in your life who need you. You also have to consider your fatigue factor, burnout rate, or your ability to be inspiring all the time.

At ACPI, we encourage you to be more creative and find more fun ways to engage your clients. All of the ways you engage your clients in exchange for their investments are multiple income streams.  Stop trading your valuable time for money and see below this sample of multiple income streams.

 Go For The Larger Income Mode From the Beginning

Why we at ACPI suggest that you began with larger income goals is to inspire your ideas and to motivate you to create a true business vision. Then through planning your Relationship Coaching business financial goals, you can initiate a six-month or twelve month plan to offer ready made courses, group coaching, training in emotional competence skills, as well as information products. ACPI provides these courses for you.

Many coaches start by pricing their services lower to attract more clients. Then when they are busy and their time is scheduled, they have no choice but to increase those hourly fees and risk losing those clients who are paying already. Why not focus on clients who have the ability to pay for your services up front and recognize the value you provide.

Few coaches, who come from helping professions to ACPI, have set income goals and actually brainstormed on how to achieve that. The multiple  income streams below have a targeted number of clients drawn to what you offer in a variety of courses, teleseminars, private coaching, or live trainings. You can see that even with minimal training, your ability to earn income can include any activities you like to provide. Otherwise without offering what you are passionate about, you are more likely to burn out and be overwhelmed. So see what is possible below. Use this sample income stream chart to plan your own Relationship Coaching journey.

Income Stream

Frequency

Monthly Income

6 Month income projection

One hour coaching for 8-weeks One hour @ $85.00/4 weeks x 8 clients $2720 $16,320
Course 1: Core Temperament Communication 4-week course and group coaching for 20 people @ $150 $3000 Offer 2x in 6 months $6000
Course 2: Emotional Skills in Relationships 4-week course and coaching support for couples.10 couples @ $500 each $5000 Offer once every 6 months. $5000
One-day Live Training in Relationships For 10 couples @ $897 per couple.  $8970 Offer once every 6 months $8970
Teleseminars  2 teleseminars per month @ $20.00–40 people per month $4800 $4800
Total     $41,090.00

 

 

Family Coaching Tool–Is Positive Self-Talk Realistic & Helpful?

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Self-talk won't help me fly. But I can imagine and play!

Self-talk won’t help me fly. But I can imagine and play!

How To Use Positive Self-

Talk Effectively

for  parents and kids 

 

By Dr. Caron Goode

A recent question from a family coach asked if ACPI Coaches use positive self-talk as a tool. I thought all of us would enjoy knowing more about self-talk, because how I have seen coaches use it (including myself) is not always the best way.

“Positive self-talk” refers to the voice in one’s head. We can observe in a child what the inner voice might say if a child makes comments to him or herself when playing, when disappointed, when exuberant.

In reviewing some of the research on positive self-talk, summaries showed good evidence for how the strategy works, but mostly through association and when paired with an activity.

Recently, my six-year-old grandson decided his summer activity would be soccer. Last Saturday was his first game, and he was nervous. I started singing affirming statements, a strategy we started together since he was about two and went through a hearty “no” stage. Basically for Calvin, he just needs a reason to do things. He never asked why? very often, just said no. A little explanation brought the light of reason and “Oh, okay, let’s go.”

Eating lunch before the game, we sang, “I am eating all my lunch. I will have a bunch… of ENERGY  for my soccer game.”  On that note, singing or rhyming works much better with children than just saying the words.

When family coaching and parent coaching use  the tool of self-talk with family members, the tool has to meet two criteria:

1. It has to be realistic. For example, Calvin was never a kid who could just say, “I play soccer well.” His rhetorical question at age five was, “But I don’t. So why say that?” The “fake it til you make it” way of using positive self-talk simply doesn’t register in the emotions or the mind. In fact, it can be detrimental if a positive parent pushes this point, “If you do it enough you will feel better.”  Well we now know that is not true.

2. It has to be associated with an event, a task, or a behavior so it sets like concrete in a child’s brain, or in adult’s brain for that matter.

A study published by the American Psychological Association shows that if there is a disconnect between one’s positive self-talk and one’s actual behavior (e.g., telling yourself you did a great job when, in fact, you didn’t), then one is more likely to feel depressed and dejected, not upbeat.

Coaches can introduce the POWERFUL tool of self-talk, but in a specific way…otherwise it is NOT EFFECTIVE. 

 

Positive self-talk has a more positive effect during a performance. This becomes more evident when associating positive self-talk and a sports skill. The child who models the positive self talk as taught to him or her during a soccer skill of dribbling with feet, is talking and practicing at the same time. This enhances learning and retention, and consequently BELIEF IN SELF! This example is exactly like asking a child to read out loud so more sensory cues receive and process information. 

For tasks like completing homework or chores, learning a new skill like riding a bike, or for a smooth transition to going to bed, positive self-talk can keep the child moving forward and eventually gain enthusiasm when seeing how an adult can do the same in modeling for them Here are a few that I use:

happy cartoon child

I use self-talk!

For a child who is grumpy in the mornings:  I am moving out of my bed. I sit up and stretch my arms and head. My feet are on the floor. I love a new day. I can learn and I can play.

For a child picking up toys…provide an incentive:  I pick up my doll, and place it against the wall (or on a shelf or in a closet) so the dog won’t chew on my toy. Oh boy. I feel great. I love to pick up toys and make my doll happy too.

For a child who hates going to school: Today is Monday, a great day, a glad day, a happy day. I like Mondays.

Self talk is especially helpful when starting a new project or job, meeting a new date, or learning a new skill, as if you inner parent voice was your best coach!

 

© 2013 by Dr. Caron Goode

Award-winning author, counselor, consultant and founder of the Academy for Coaching Parents International, LLC. Contact Caron @ caron.goode @ me.com

Nurturing Children’s Emotional Intelligence

positive emotion
positive emotion

Developing emotional intelligence оr EQ іn children wіll help them as adults to build…

  • а rational thought process
  • better relationships through empathy, and
  • alliances and partnerships that fulfill personal needs
 Your parenting emotional intelligence skills like acceptance, empathy, and reading other people’s feelings саn save children from imprudent actions and gullibility throughout their maturing years.
Awareness of emotional intelligence helps children tо understand their personal feelings better. Parenting with emotional intelligence contributes tо  children’s rapid psychological development іn а positive direction. Hardships аrе а part оf life, аnd emotionally intelligent children are better equipped tо deal through resilience аnd sensitivity tо other people’s feelings.
Parenting goals for good grades, eating and sleeping well now include healthy emotions. Thе world іѕ not bound bу distances. The virtual world allows uѕ tо interact wіth оur counterparts асrоѕѕ various geographical locations. The emotionally healthy child can be culturally sensitive and curious about their friends online. As adults, they аlѕо perform better іn thеіr careers, are sensitive parents, become successful entrepreneurs and even more valuable employees tо companies with corporate cultures of openness and value for emotional awareness.

Parenting tо Develop Emotional Intelligence іn Children

Encourage Reading

 Children аrе mоѕtlу inclined towards stories with characters like themselves or with qualities they admire, like the

Cover of "How to Take the Grrrr Out of An...

Cover via Amazon

roles of a helper, an adventurer, a collector of dinosaurs. Thеу аll help іn making уоur children morally strong bу subtly introducing thеm tо а variety оf life experiences. Thеу аlѕо get tо understand different perspectives оf people аnd how tо deal wіth diverse situations thаt mау face іn future. Books highlight negative аnd positive attitude аnd behavior оf people wіth different personalities, whіlе polishing thеіr language skills.

Suggested Links

  1. Barry4kids, a wonderful site for children in 4 languages – especially designed to help children learn with fun; also for visually-impaired children 
  2. Have You Filled a Bucket Today? – Mccloud, Carol/ Messing, David (ILT)
  3. Why Are You So Sad: A Child’s Book about Parental Depression – Andrews, Beth/ Wong, Nicole E. (ILT)
  4. How to Take the Grrrr Out of Anger – Verdick, Elizabeth/ Lisovskis, Marjority
  5. The Way I Feel – Cain, Janan
  6. Courage – Waber, Bernard/ Waber, Bernard (ILT)

 

Listen to your kids

Listen to your kids (Photo credit: Bindaas Madhavi)

Participation іn Extracurricular Activities іn School

It helps іn real-life interaction оf уоur kids wіth others оf thе same age аnd promotes emotional intelligence аmоngѕt thеm. Extracurricular activities аlѕо help уоur children tо express thеmѕеlvеѕ аnd deal wіth thеіr emotions. It brings аbоut self-awareness аѕ thеу discover new aspects оf thеіr own personality. Alѕо, іt brings healthy competition аnd encourages уоur child tо polish thеіr skills. Suсh children grow uр tо become extroverted аnd have а flare fоr public interaction.
This is an interesting research summary supporting extracurricular activities for emotional intelligence skills development.

  1. [PDF]   Using extracurricular activity as an indicator of  – ResearchGate

    www.researchgate.net/…extracurricular_activity…/79e4151…

    of “well-rounded,” emotionally intelligent, and interpersonally skilled students. Intuitively, ex  Is participation in extracurricular activity 

More Play Time Wіth Othеr Children

At home, after уоur child comes bасk frоm school, encourage hіm tо go оut аnd play wіth оthеr kids іn thе neighborhood. Playing, parenting, exercising, or walking іn аn environment away frоm school аlѕо helps thеm ease uр. It іѕ аn unregulated environment аnd behavior іѕ nоt monitored unlеѕѕ parents intervene. Thіѕ іѕ thе time whеn children exhibit thеіr true nature аnd attitude. Thеу learn tо look оut fоr thеmѕеlvеѕ. A playground іѕ аn unstructured social setting whеrе relationships аrе based uроn interaction wіth thоѕе аrоund thе child.
www.pinterest.com/helpfulcounsel/feelings-emotional-intelligence/

Involve Children аt Homeemotional intelligence

Involve уоur children wіth family activities. Early parenting  misconceptions thаt children ѕhоuld bе kept away frоm issues involving thе family аnd thе household іn order tо protect thеm оr nоt put аnу burden оn thеm. Yоu mау bе alienating thе child unknowingly. Involve thеm іn parenting decisions like whаt tо buy frоm thе supermarket оn а grocery budget, even fоr grander ideas like discussing weekend plans or family vacations.   Ask thеіr help tо make sweets fоr festivities, take care оf thе dog оr help іn cleaning thе kitchen. This involvement with parents supports responsible kids.
http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/connection/play-child-emotional-intelligence

Encourage Children tо Talk

Bу giving уоur child thе freedom tо express hіmѕеlf аrоund уоu аnd оthеr family members, уоu wіll ensure thаt thеrе аrе no negative feelings іn уоur child’s heart towards аnу situation thаt mау occur even outside home. It wіll keep уоu aware оf thе daily developments іn уоur child’s life.

In summary

Parenting  children to develop emotional  intelligence protects thеm; they learn awareness of feelings, to act rationally, to use reason when feelings are confused, to show a heart-felt connection to others, as well as understand how other people feel. Thеу аlѕо learn tо help others аrоund thеm, show compassion аnd respect fоr оthеr human beings. Thеу wіll аlѕо со-operate wіth уоu аnd build а healthy parenting-child relationship.
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Family Coaching: When Tragedy Strikes- 10 Tips for Helping Children Cope with Grief, Loss and Trauma

listen to a child

5961100771_9cb408c6c6_n.jpg No one is immune from experiencing tragedy and many who are affected by such traumatic circumstances are children.  When a child is affected by tragedy, we are often at a loss as to how to help.  Below are ten tips to help children with the healing process of grief, loss and trauma.

1- Take care of yourself.  Allow yourself to grieve and work through your own emotions so that you are more effectively able to help your child.  I often hear, “I need to be strong – I should not be crying or feel so much anger.”

Recognizing and allowing yourself to accept and express your feelings will help to make you strong and will enable you to help others with their grief.  Be careful though not to make your children feel that they need to “fix” you.

2-  Allow, even encourage, your children to express their emotions.  Provide your children with a safe and secure environment to release their feelings.  Do not try to make their pain go away by telling them it will be okay or that they need to “get over it”. Their pain will lessen the more they are able to feel their feelings and know it is acceptable to do so.  Validate your children’s feelings- let them know it is okay to feel sad, angry, hurt, etc.  and acknowledge that they may feel this way.  They will let you know if you are incorrect.

3- Provide creative outlets for your child to release their emotions.    The following ideas provide wonderful opportunities for your child to express their feelings in a safe and non-threatening manner.

 

  • Coloring
  • Drawing
  • Molding Clay
  • Writing
  • Story-telling
  • Running
  • Playing tether-ball
  • Wrestling
  • Playing house
  • Photography

 

Participating with your child as much as possible is ideal!

4- Recognize there are many different coping styles.  Depending on your child’s overall temperament style, some children will cry, some will show anger, others will withdrawal, some may show regressive tendencies and some may express their grief through “acting out” behavior.  It is important to help a child to release their feelings in a healthy and acceptable manner.  If a child is showing anger by hitting the family dog or kicking her brother, guide your child to replace this unacceptable behavior with a more acceptable outlet such as hitting “the angry pillow”.  Although the behavior may be unacceptable, the emotion should always be accepted.

imgres5-  Comfort your child.  Children need to feel loved more than ever during such difficult times.  There is nothing like a good ol’ bear hug to help your child feel safe and secure.  Physical touch such as holding your child, rubbing their back, or simply snuggling together can be very soothing, helping your child (as well as yourself) to relieve stress and anxiety.

6- Listen to your child.  Give your child your full attention when they are talking to you.  Many children will want to tell what happened many times over.  It is important not to get frustrated with your child. This is one of many coping mechanisms and will help your child to process what has happened and will help them to deal with their pain.  If your child does not want to talk, encourage the use of other expressive outlets as in step #3 and participate in the activity with your child.  Reading fictional stories about loss or using age-appropriate television shows as a catalyst to discussion is often effective in stimulating conversation about what has happened.

7-  Answer children’s questions honestly with age appropriate responses.   The younger the child, it is best to answer with simple and limited responses.  There is no reason to share details that could paint a grim picture of the tragic event.  Your child will let you know if they are not satisfied with your response by asking more questions. 

8- Maintain a normal schedule and routine as much as possible.  Children’s stress levels decrease dramatically when they know what to expect.

Continuing with a typical day of school, activities, play time with friends, meal and bed time is important to help a child feel secure and maintain a healthy balance of his emotions.

9- Create a support system- Let other caring adults that are close to your child know what is going on.  Family members, friends and especially your child’s teacher can be very instrumental in providing the emotional support your child needs during such a difficult time.  Asking for feedback will also help to reassure you as to how your child is doing when you are not able to present with her.

10-Allow time to be a major part of the healing process- Not only does everyone grieve differently,  but everyone also heals at their own pace.  There is no magic in how long it should take a child to grieve.  Some children will process their pain and emotions and be able to “move on” rather quickly while others may seem “stuck” in the moment taking a much longer time to process the event and release their emotions.

 

*Seeking professional counseling should always be considered especially if your child has been directly affected by the loss of a family member or someone very close to her.

 

© 2012   Sharon Egan M.S., CPC

 

 

Sharon Egan, M.S., CPC is an ACPI Certified Parent Coach and is also an Educational Consultant.  Sharon resides in Roswell, GA and is sole-proprietor of What Now? Parent Coach.  She is passionate about helping parents build strong and healthy connections with their children so fun and laughter are abundant in the home.  Sharon can be contacted at 404-432-1590 or by e-mailing her at sharonegan@whatnowparentcoach.com.  You can also visit her website at www.whatnowparentcoach.com.

 

Family Coaching Tips for Kids and Electronics

sharon egan
family coach

Family Coach Training April 2015

ACPI Family Coach Trainer, Sharon Egan, offers some excellent tips to reduce power struggles amongst kids and their attachments to those friendly electronic gadgets. 

 

Do you find yourself battling with your children over the use of electronics?  Does it seem as though your children are on a “screened object” every time you turn around?  Have you tried talking, warning, yelling, threatening, punishing only to no avail?

Below are 10 tips to avoid, reduce and even eliminate power struggles with your little darlings over the gadgets we so fondly have a love/hate relationship with.

1-Get curious. Talk with your child about what interests him about the gadgets and games he appears to love so much. Make sure he is not immersing himself in electronics as a cover, an escape or as an avoidance tactic to something else that may be going on in his life.

2.  Be a positive role-model.  Set your own timer and stick to your limit (in front of your children)! Think of all the times you have said to yourself, “OMG, I can’t believe how much time I was just on the computer time really gets away when I am surfing the web, on Facebook, or doing e-mails.”  Remember- if time gets away from you, it also gets away from your child.

3. Spend time with your child. Unplug all devices, put down the “to-do lists” and “plug in” with your child when she may otherwise be drawn to electronics.  Connecting with your child with daily one on one time will result in greater cooperation in other areas in daily life and less time on devices.  (Hint-agree to an electronic free zone and time where child chooses something fun to do with you).

4. Determine a designated time limit with your child. Ask your child how he will honor the time limit. (Timers, that your child is in control of, are very useful). Although it is most advantageous for your child to develop internal self-control, it is helpful to ask him if he needs or would like your help in monitoring his usage.  If he gives you permission, the need for a power struggle is greatly reduced.  Careful!- nagging will back fire!  (If needed for academics, be flexible).

5. Keep your child’s computer use in an open area such as in the kitchen or family room .  Your child will find it much less interesting to spend so much time on the computer when you are present to monitor and supervise her use.

6Show interest in the types of electronics that your child is engaged in.  Talk and listen to your child about what she finds so enjoyable.  Play games with her or have your child teach you some new skills based on her interest.  You will be modeling and showing your child that you are open-minded and willing to try something new.  You may even discover what she is doing is actually okay and acceptable to you.

7. Acknowledge and Validate your child’s desire to be an active part of the digital era.  When your child feels you understand that technology is important to him and that it can be fun and even educational and that you are not trying to control him, he will feel understood and validated.  Simply being understood is often enough to diminish his need to be plugged in and engage in a power struggle.

8. Focus on other areas of your child’s strengths and interests.    Encourage your child to put more time into other areas they are Family Coachinginterested in.  Show excitement and get creative with your child to find a balance with alternative activities.  Support their interests in any way you are able to.

9. Give your child choices.  The more choices a child has throughout each day (that affects herself), the more in control she will feel over her life and the less she will feel the need to take control in other areas, such as with electronic usage.

10. Include your child in setting limits.  When a child has a say in the rules, he will be much more likely to follow through without a fight.  Make sure limits are fair and age-appropriate.   Enforce these limits consistently and with positive communication.

 

Copyright 2014 by What Now? Parent Coach Sharon Egan M.S., CPC

 www.whatnowparentcoach.com

sharonegan@whatnowparentcoach.com

 

What A Family Coach Does and How To Become One

coaching families
family coach

A Brief Introduction

A Family Coach is a facilitator of discovery, a motivator to action, and a model of communication.

A Family coach helps family members grow into successful experiences. 

Extraordinary growth comes from outside the area called “you don’t know” – your blind spots. Imagine a big bubble just beyond your reach filled with a vast array of marvelous, new ideas. But, you are blind to it.

As if all parents were facing forward, busy in school or at the office, you are busy too. You might not think to look around or ask someone  like a family coach who can help you find the answers.

You see, few family coaches will just tell you what to do. In one sense, that rips off your self-discovery process, for yourself and all the family members. Rather, coaches listen, feel, and observe and ask to help you go to the inner bubble of personal knowing —THAT is your unknown, unseen wisdom waiting to rise to the top.

You wouldn’t let your child climb up on a bike he doesn’t know how to ride without helping him balance, pedal and practice until he has a feel for the bike and the rhythm and speed to do it by himself. You stay balanced with a family coach until you feel the thrill of success just like your child careens downhill on his bike with hands in the air, “Wheeeeee.” That is the thrill of accomplishment. How much success could a family coach help you achieve? How much overwhelm could a family coach help you dispel? How often do you wish someone would listen to you as deeply as you listen to your family.

Read more about becoming a Family Coach here

Download the brief introduction to family coaching here: E-Book. Enjoy deeper understanding of the coaching role. Who knows? You may even decide to take the Family Coach Training starting August 28th. 

Family Coach Tip -4 Ways to Show Appreciation to Your Family

5 ways to show gratitude

Free Download

By Sharon Egan, CPC & Family Coach Trainer 

Everyday your life is filled with goodness through kind gestures and through kindness from your family. This family coach tip is a gently reminder…everyday there is an opportunity to see the uniqueness of one family member and to show how you appreciate his or her affect on your life. Often I tell my children how I appreciate a specific strength or how I noticed a kind act. Showing appreciation is truly a heart-connector.

The following 4 tips offer suggestions to help you demonstrate appreciation for that special person.

family coach tip

Showing Gratitude

 

  1. Count your blessings. After you awaken each morning, count your blessings of the one family member you are appreciating. Write a small “appreciation note”or verbally offer your appreciation with a hug and a smile.

What a kind way for both of you to start your day. The Institute of Heartmath® demonstrated that love and positive feelings stay in the cells of the heart, muscles and organs for up to 7 hours.

  1. Create a Gratitude or Appreciation Corner. This family coach tip is so appreciated by our childrenThis corner could be your creation or created and used by the whole family. The gratitude corner is stocked with different colored pens, sticky notes, and index cards. You write whom you are grateful for that day and why. Invite other family members to do the same. Even a selfie can be used. Post on a poster board or cork board as reminders.
  1. Say “thank you” every time is an important family coach tip for modeling gratitude for other family members, whose kind act or gesture is shared with you. Even better, using positive I-statements reassures a child, partner, or parent that you noticed and do not take their actions for granted.
    1. I like what you did so much.
    2. I feel so loved.
    3. I appreciate you too.
    4. I am going to do that for you one day as a surprise.
    5. I think you are so thoughtful.
  1. Leave “Thank You” notes. Few people give thank-you notes anymore, yet this family coach tip is such a well-received token of appreciation. We forget how nice it is to get a handwritten note, knowing that someone who cares for you took the time to personalize their thoughts and thank you for something that was special to them.

As you can see, there are many ways to show gratitude and appreciation to the people who are important in your life. Not only will they be grateful, but these acts of kindness make you feel good too.  Putting a smile on someone’s face and some joy in their heart is the best family coach tip yet!

 

Download  This Free Certificate of Appreciation for someone in your life

Want More Certificate Ideas and Fun. Check This Out!

 

Want More Certificate Ideas? Check Out The Entire Site